Going on a first date is exciting but it can also be terrifying, especially if you really like the person you’re going on a date with. While it will be your personality, how much fun you have and whether or not you connect with your date that will ultimately determine whether or not there is a second date, how you look does play a role in that as well. Just as you are less likely to want a second date if you’re not attracted to the person you’re going on a date with, the man will also be less likely to want a second date if he isn’t attracted to you. While these common beauty blunders turn men off, it’s important to remember that they’re far from deal breakers. If you want to make the best possible impression on your first date though, keep these ten rules in mind. They could make all the difference.
10: Dark lipstick
Dark lipstick is bold, eye catching and dramatic but it can also be messy. While many men like the way women look in dark lipstick, they might not be as eager to go in for that goodnight kiss if they’re worried about getting that eye catching color all over their lips and face. A dark color on your lips also requires maintenance over the course of the evening. It can easily smudge, run or wear off leaving it looking tired and dull. Let’s not even mention get into the lipstick on the teeth issue. Stick with lighter, less dramatic shades. In general, lighter shades are more appropriate for a first date anyway. You can always save the bold lipstick for later on in the relationship when you and your man go somewhere that calls for a more dramatic, standout look.
09: Too much jewelry
I love jewelry. That will come as no surprise to anyone who has been reading this blog for any amount of time, but it was worth mentioning again because, despite my love of bold, eclectic jewelry, I like to keep date night jewelry simple. Lots of jewelry can be distracting. Bangles, chunky necklaces, chandelier earrings and things of that nature are often just too much for a first date. Bangles can be especially problematic because they can be noisy. Stick to one or two simple pieces that compliment your outfit – a simple silver or gold chain with a demure pendant, pretty drop earrings and maybe a single bracelet.
08: Overly polished appearance
The picture I’ve chosen for this one isn’t exactly what I was going for with this one, to be honest. When I think of overly polished women, I think of Bebe Neuwirth’s Lilith Crane character from Frasier and Cheers. You are going on a date, not a job interview. It’s okay to look a little more relaxed. Looking too polished makes you look cold and unapproachable. You really want to go for a softer look if you’re going on your first date with someone. There is nothing wrong with Bebe’s Lilith look … in the right context. The woman in the photo above gives off a slightly different impression than Bebe did as Lilith, but she illustrates another side of this point. Overly polished women like the woman in the photo above give off an “expensive taste” sort of vibe. You really want to avoid that if you haven’t yet had the opportunity to let a man get to know who you really are as a person.
07: Too much gloss
I love me some lip gloss. I have tons of the stuff in all sorts of colors that offer varying degrees of shine but just like dark lipstick, it can really put a guy off when it comes to the goodnight kiss. Most gloss is sticky and while we’re used to it, guys often aren’t. Many men take one look at glossy lips and think about how gross it’s going to feel on their own lips. That isn’t to say gloss is off limits on a first date. Just keep it minimal and try to use a high quality product that isn’t too sticky.
06: Overdone hair
The woman in the photo above is a beautiful woman and I honestly like her hair, but sometimes finding appropriate photos for stories like this one can be a challenge. After careful discussion with my husband, whom I feel is a pretty good representation of the ‘every man’, I decided that as much as I like her hair, the look might turn some guys off. In my husband’s words, “it looks like you wouldn’t be able to run your fingers through it” which is the core problem with over done hair. When you use a lot of styling products to get your perfect look, you might love the end result but your date could look at it and feel put off by it. Many men like running their fingers through a woman’s hair which isn’t easy to do if your hair is full of tangles, gels or sprays. Keep it simple. It’s the first date, not a red carpet event.
05: Super-tall heels
The number one rule of dressing for any occasion should always be comfort and that is as true with dressing for a first date as it is with dressing for any other event. If you’re not comfortable, your date will be able to pick up on that. Shoes with super high heels are rarely comfortable. They make your legs look fantastic but that will do you little good if you’re complaining about how sore your feet are the rest of the evening. Aside from that, super high heels can be intimidating. While in some situations that’s a plus, on a date, it can be a serious drawback. You don’t want to intimidate your date.
04: Super-revealing outfits
This one might seem a little unusual considering what many women think men want. Sure most men like to look at women in bikinis and revealing outfits but that doesn’t necessarily mean they want to date a woman who is showing everything she’s got on the first date. It’s okay to leave something to the imagination. Baring your body in something ultra-revealing is going to get his attention, sure but it’s going to get the wrong kind of attention, unless, of course, you’re looking for a one night stand.
Glitter is like dark lipstick and lip gloss but much, much worse. Glitter gets on everything. Guys know this just as much as we do. The last thing a guy wants is to go home at the end of the night and see glitter all over his face and clothes. Glitter can offer a fun, flirty and youthful look that can create a great mood for your date but if you are going to use it, be sure you use it very sparingly. Your date is not going to want to go home covered in your leftover glitter, especially since once it’s on, it can be difficult to get it all off.
02: Fake everything
Fake eyelashes are okay. Hair extensions are fine. False nails? Sure. Why not? A little padding in your bra? No problem. A few little helping hands from the ‘fake products department’ can be fine as long as you don’t go overboard. Your first date is the chance to show your guy who you are. How can you show him who you are if you’ve used a bunch of fake products to make yourself into someone that looks completely different than you would normally look. Say things go really well and you decide you want to go home with him or take him home with you. What happens when all of those fake products come off? Guys like to call that false advertising. So do I. A good rule of thumb to follow: if more than one element of your look includes the word “fake” or “false” or could be described as fake or false, you have gone to far.
01: Strongly scented perfumes or beauty products
The scent you wear makes an impression on your guy but you really want to make sure your scent makes the right impression. You don’t want to beat him over the head with your perfume. First, some people are incredibly sensitive to strongly scented products, so bathing in perfume is just generally bad manners to begin with. Second, if the scent is overpowering, that may be all your date can focus on. I like to spray a little perfume in the air and walk through it forward and then backward. By doing so, I get a light misting of my favorite scent from head to toe without the scent being too strong.
Of course, many of these are guidelines. Some men would disagree with everything on this list. While looking good on a date is important, there is nothing in the world sexier and more alluring than confidence. Wear what makes you feel good. Wear something that makes you feel beautiful. You won’t just be making sure you feel good about yourself. You’ll also ensure your date gets to meet the real you. Don’t try to be what he’s looking for. Be who you want him to find appealing – you.